Rebuilding creative confidence: five creativity mindset tips
I break out into a cold sweat if someone asks me to do mathematics - adding, multiplying, subtracting, etc. Is this normal? It is for a sensitive someone who was humiliated in classes at school.
I was having real trouble with my zero times tables at primary school. The teacher asked me what 0 x 5 equalled. I didn’t know. I didn’t know so much that the class started shouting at me for the time it was taking to answer. Finally, my friend whispered in my ear, “zero”. I tentatively spoke the word. Smiles returned and order was restored, but I felt unbelievably upset and I can still remember how I felt. Obviously I couldn’t do maths, said my inner critic.
This was reinforced at high school, when I didn’t understand the maths equations on the board. I bravely put my hand up and asked the (widely-known to be mean) teacher for help. He laughed at me. And then he laughed some more, loudly, in front of the whole class. “What could you possibly not understand?!?” I was speechless and put my head down. Another day, in that same class, my best friend, Donna, and I got our math test results: I got 50%, she got 100%. Donna was so kind and said that I had done really well. And she actually meant it. (I didn’t take that one to heart, and Donna was eventually Dux anyway!)
It can really mess with your internal wiring when someone tells you at a critical developmental moment that you are useless, hopeless, without a creative/scientific/artistic bone in your body. I’ve sat in a few watercolour art classes now and have noticed that a lot of adult students have been told at some point that they’re not creative. From my experience (see above!), it often traces back to a throwaway, thoughtless comment that really stuck, and then we believe them to be facts.
So, how do we rewrite creative wounds? I discovered truth coaches via a NZ counsellor, David Riddell. They are gentle, corrective inner statements that help to rewire unhelpful childhood messages and build a healthier creative mindset. Here are a few truth coaches I have found helpful:
“My value or creative work isn’t measured by someone else’s opinion” Forget what that horrid person said to you to de-rail you. Write them a letter (then rip it up) telling them the impact their callous, thoughtless comments had on you. Who are they to judge you? Your creativity belongs to you. You can overcome your creative fear and find your own creative freedom. No one else should have the final say on your creative abilities.
“That voice in my head isn’t mine; it was someone else’s limitation” A horrid teacher, a busy parent or a perfectionist (or cruel) adult might be speaking from their own frustration, when you deserved a loving, kind, and helpful response. Your creativity wasn’t ever the problem; rather, their perspective was too narrow.
“I’m allowed to learn, practise, and be a beginner; I don’t have to be perfect” Lots of people think that they must be able to be instantly skilled to be creative, but skill only comes with practice. You’re allowed to have a ‘creative growth mindset’, to take small steps with beginner-friendly creativity, and you’re allowed to make imperfect things (who’s judging anyway?). You’re allowed to be new at this!
“My creativity didn’t disappear; it was interrupted” Unlocking your creative potential suggests waiting for a safe time for to recover or rescue your creativity. There are so many wonderful art classes that provide this encouraging, safe space. It’s an absolute balm! You’ll be amazed at what a step-by-step approach to drawing or painting can achieve. The watercolour art that I have produced has been a true revelation to me. I’m not sure sometimes whether it was me who did it - I love the images so much!
“I create because it brings me pleasure and joy” Creativity isn’t a contest. Your creative self-expression will never take the same path as another’s. You can create purely because it makes you feel good and brings you pleasure, (and that’s absolutely okay!) and you’ll find an increasing sense of creative wellbeing and courage. Creating can be a time to breathe (remember to breathe!), experiment, and reconnect with nature beauty, and often, recover from hurt, pain or grief.
When I started my watercolour adventure, I heard discouraging voices in my head, saying things like, you can’t draw, you don’t know what you’re doing, no one will want to see this, how embarrassing, what a terrible mess, etc. But, with a few key truth coaches, and lots of repetition, I have elbowed my way past these voices. I am creative, I can draw, people want to see my work, I’m proud of my paintings and designs, my work is beautiful. Result!
My artist friend, Jennifer Duval-Smith, has these two lovely pearls of wisdom for creative adults finding their feet in her watercolour classes. She says: “There’s no judgement at this table. Nobody is looking over your shoulder and criticising you.” And my all-time favourite: “You’re not creating this for other people, you’re creating this for you, so who cares if it’s shit.”
What about you? Have you overcome those inner critic voices, that stop you from moving forward? Share your stories in my comments; I’d love to hear of your experience.
Best wishes
Sara x
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Learning a new technique
In this class I was learning to recognise the space around the object (called the ‘negative space’). The rectangle I drew was to have a defined area within which to fit the image. The perspective doesn’t look quite right because the pepper was on a different angle when I painted it. I’m pleased with the result; with the light and dark shades and the blending of colours.
Having ways to break down a painting into different steps (such as recognising the empty space, and having the rectangle to paint within) really helps to recover creative confidence. It worked for me and I’m really proud of my painting!
